Shadow Selves in Megillat Esther

In chapter 1 of the book of Esther, we meet King Achashverosh and Queen Vashti. In chapter 2, we meet a second pair, a second man and woman: Mordechai and Esther. 

The King is a fool. He is drunk. He is out of control. His impulsive demands lead to dire consequences. The Queen is independant-minded and disobedient. 

These two represent the exact opposite to the man and woman we meet in chapter 2:

Mordechai is very careful and controlled. He instructs Esther not to reveal her Jewish identity. He walks in front of the harem, trying to gather information about Esther, because without information he cannot control the situation. He commands Esther in chapter 4 to go into the king. He is in control of himself, and he is in control of Esther.

Esther is obedient. She does what Mordechai commands her. 

Achashverosh and Vashti represent their Shadow selves, the selves that Mordechai and Esther push down out of sight - though they are still there, working away in the subconscious. But as the story progresses, the Shadow selves emerge.

Esther ceases to simply obey Mordechai. She does not rebel, but she does take matters into her own hands and begin to implement her own plan. When this happens, Mordechai is no longer in control - he cedes control to Esther and ultimately to the Divine Providence that brings Haman knocking at the King's door that fateful night. 

When working with our Shadow selves, the parts of us that frighten us or are not known to our conscious minds, the idea is not to go to the other extreme and transform into that self (lack of control, wild rebellion etc). It is rather to bring them up in such a way that they are healthily integrated into the rest of our personality, and we are no longer afraid of being that way.

*This insight was gained while doing Bibliodrama, Adar 5782.

Haman the Ungrateful

As R Shalom Arush points out, Haman's evil lies in his not being satisfied with his life. Haman says in Esther 5:13:

וְכָל זֶה אֵינֶנּוּ שׁוֶֹה לִי בְּכָל עֵת אֲשֶׁר אֲנִי רֹאֶה אֶת מָרְדֳּכַי הַיְּהוּדִי יוֹשֵׁב בְּשַׁעַר הַמֶּלֶךְ

Yet all this avails me nothing, so long as I see Mordecai the Jew sitting at the king’s gate.

Haman had so much - supportive wife, many children, friends, high position, wealth, but he cared about none of it because he was eating himself up alive over another person. This is the essence of Amalek. Being ungrateful means you are seeing daily miracles and scoffing at them, belittling - which is what Amalek, Haman's ancestors, did after the miracles in Egypt.

My friend Mosheh Givental pointed out to me that we Jews go by three names: עברים - meaning we are boundary-crossers; ישראלים, we are Godwrestlers; and יהודים, we are thankers - Jew coming from Judah, whose name came from his mother's decision to stop pining after Jacob's love, after her lack, but thank instead for what she had.
The person known most prominently as the יהודי in the Tanach is Mordechai. Mordechai the grateful (though I don't know if we necessarily see this trait explicit in the megillah - what do you think?)

Hold him up against Haman the Ungrateful and contrast.

The joy and gratitude of Purim prepares us for the דיינו of Pesach. And that is freedom - where no matter what happens in our lives, we hold on to our inner practice of gratitude.